I've been meaning to post this for ages. There really are heartwarming or hilarious aspects of my job. Really. It's just that the insane ones tend to overshadow them. I have a new nursery school down in Southeast Berlin with really little children. Like, I think the parents are cheating and some of these kids are two and a half-little. So I'm there, doing my little intro-class with all the parents there and I'm teaching the kids how to introduce themselves. This entails going around in a circle and me saying several thousand times "My name is Mia--Ich bin die Mia--What's your name--wie heisst du?" and then prompting them "Myyy naaaame issss--wie heisst du?--" So becaues these kids are so young, this is taking a while. I finally get to this charming little girl. Really cute as a button. And I go through my whole little schpiel and she answers "Myyyy naaame isss Annamossweebela". Of course, I'm looking at this child like she's speaking in tongues, because this makes no sense in either English or German. My first thought is "perhaps she's Russian"--in any event, I ask her again what her name is, and she says "Annamossweebela" again. At this point, the nursery-school teacher jumps in and says "Anna". So I write her name down. The next kid says his name is "Doctor Haxe"--not that I have any idea what that's supposed to be a reference to, but the parents are amused and someone jumps in and tells me that this child is Paul. After this little info-class is over, I give the parents the little speech about how our program is set up and what they can expect and our philosophy and everything, and after I'm done, during the Q&A, a mother approaches me. She turns out to be the mother of little Annamossweebela and she was terribly apologetic--it turns out they call the little girl "Anna-mouse"--not only does she think this is her real name, but like many small children, she pronounces her first and last names as one gigantic word, making the end result an utterly unintelligible chaos. I didn't get a similar explanation for Doctor Haxe, but I'm keeping an ear out.
The other week, in another one of my schools, a smart, cute little six-year-old busted out with "Miiiiaaaaa, what's your real job?" I laughed a little and answered "Elias, this is my real job." His reply: "Oh. You can't make very much money, then." I've got to say, I was impressed with his shrewdness.
I've had the recent pleasure of doing Easter-themed classes and one of my favorite mistakes the kids make is referring to the Easter Bunny as "Mister Bunny". I never noticed before, but the two sound incredibly similar. The poor kids know that "Mister" is English, so it makes sense to them, and most of the time they can't understand why I'm correcting them.
Let's see...what else is amusing about my job?
H'm.
I can't think of anything.
The most important thing is that Easter Vacation started today, which means I'm now only working half time. It's like the psychotic part of my job just...falls away. Or at least one psychotic part. We were planning on going up to Rostock/Gross Schwiesow for the Easter holidays, but apparently the plan has changed, so we're going back to the mountains with Angie and the Grandparents. I'm okay with both plans, really. Hopefully the weather will be better. During the 50th anniversary (the last time we were there) it pissed rain the entire time. And since there's so much beautiful nature there, it was a real shame.
However.
Enough about beautiful nature. We're going to Kai's for dinner, and I've got to change up.
tschao.
Friday, March 30, 2007
Saturday, March 10, 2007
Saturday Morning, or Wintersport
*Enter contented sigh here*
...Finally weekend. And for March, the weather's finally starting to shape up. I have to say, I am among those who hate the month of March with a passion and a vengeance. However, Berlin is starting to come through for me. At least the sun has made a few appearances in the last week, and it's been warm--and both have helped me to deal with the reciprocating shitstorm that is my job. Like I mentioned in my last post, I'm in the middle of doing "open classrooms" for the parents of my students. It's a real mixed bag. I've had parents demand my replacement and threaten to take their kids out of the course, and I've had parents ask me to tutor their children privately. The words "hell auf begeistert" have also been uttered in regards to my teaching abilities, which loosely translated means super-enthusiastic. But I've also had a bunch of kids being like "I've quit, my mum has taken me out of the class because I hate it!" Aaaawesome. Those are the times I wish it wasn't against the law or my personal morals to hit a child. And of course, my boss hears all these things and is like "what the fuck is she doing?!" So I'm on probation again, and she's doing a surprise visit to one of my classes/schools next week. Grrrrreat. The good news is, after this woman called my boss, we had a big, fat teleconference and I was like, "guess what, I quit!" Which sounds wayyy cooler and more satisfactory than it actually is, since it stands in my contract explicitly than I cannot quit, I can only say I refuse to renew it after the end of the school year. So yeah. That's what the plan is. Which we all know has been the plan since, like...October, but my boss was pretty surprised. She was all like, "I really hope you change your mind--think it over," and telling me that trained teachers at our company have the same problems that I do and worse, and offering me only to work in nursery schools next year. Which would partly solve the problem...but partly not. I mean, yeah, I have huge discipline problems in some of my schools...and really none with my little kids. But what I don't like is the whole "you don't work, you don't get paid" deal--and the fact that I commute like, 15 hours a week between schools, all unpaid. It's an enormous waste of time and a huge drain.
So yeah, now my boss knows that I'm done. And that's good. It's just a question of getting through the next four months. Ughhhhh.
But back to nice things: I got woken up by my future mother-in-law this morning--she's planning a coup at her parent's golden wedding anniversary including Stephan's and my surprise arrival. So we had to discuss that. It'll be hectic trying to get it all organized, but worth it--the grandparents will be out of their heads. Again, I'm soooo lucky to have such a wonderful second family. This whole entry is procrastination, though. I should be writing my invoice for work so that I can get paid this month--but it's so freaking obnoxious to write down where I was on what day, add all the hours together, add up how much money I should get...track down every single receipt from every single photocopy I've made for work, write down on the back of every receipt what I photocopied and for what class...and add up the amount. Is it any wonder that I'm putting it off?! Christ!
I really don't want to talk about work any more, though. I'm lucky to have one, period. And I'm working on finding out what would be better/more fulfilling for me...and gasp! possibly long term. If you have suggestions, holleratcha girl. So far, I've spent the morning conspiring, sleeping on the couch during biathlon and watching the Nordic skiing world cup. It's so cool. You can sleep, wake up, get excited, sleep some more, wake up, watch amazing skiiers...it's incredibly relaxing. And I need to be relaxed if I'm going to rock my evening tonight. Thursday, I rebelled against the fact that I had to get up at 6am and went to an English-speaking social thing-y at a bar in Mitte. I was supposed to meet Katie, a friend of mine there, but I was early and she was late so I started talking to these girls who I thought were British. I was like "hey, do you guys know Katie Turner?" --"noooo" "Oh. Are you here for the English-speaking social thing?" ---"noooo, we're not English." "Uhh, well Katie's Scottish" --"we're not Scottish either." "Oh! Well, where are you from?" --"Iceland, Iceland and Denmark." At this point, I was kinda embarrassed and was ready to leave, but they were so nice and my gin tonic was still full, so I sat down with them and started to chat. Two hours later, I finally caught a glimpse of Katie, who'd been afraid I wasn't coming at all, but by then it was so late, I could only chat with her for a few minutes before I really had to head home. Still, it was hilarious. So the two Icelandic girls are throwing a party tonight and I'm really excited. I think it'll be a riotous good time. I also find it hilarious that I went to this thing hoping to network with english-speakers and wound up chilling with english-speaking scandinavians. Ri-ot.
But before I get to play, I have to survive dinner at Christian and Cindy's new apartment. 'Nuff said, I hope. Cindy actually said "hey! maybe we can have that board-game night we've always been meaning to have!" I tried to put it off on her being drunk, but...no. She was serious. Fortunately there's a boxing match tonight that Stephan really wants to see, so he'll make sure we're out of there in time. Niiiice.
Anyway, time to decide if I'm going to the hardware store or the gym. H'mmmmm.
kiss. (first cheek)
kiss. (other cheek)
.mia.
...Finally weekend. And for March, the weather's finally starting to shape up. I have to say, I am among those who hate the month of March with a passion and a vengeance. However, Berlin is starting to come through for me. At least the sun has made a few appearances in the last week, and it's been warm--and both have helped me to deal with the reciprocating shitstorm that is my job. Like I mentioned in my last post, I'm in the middle of doing "open classrooms" for the parents of my students. It's a real mixed bag. I've had parents demand my replacement and threaten to take their kids out of the course, and I've had parents ask me to tutor their children privately. The words "hell auf begeistert" have also been uttered in regards to my teaching abilities, which loosely translated means super-enthusiastic. But I've also had a bunch of kids being like "I've quit, my mum has taken me out of the class because I hate it!" Aaaawesome. Those are the times I wish it wasn't against the law or my personal morals to hit a child. And of course, my boss hears all these things and is like "what the fuck is she doing?!" So I'm on probation again, and she's doing a surprise visit to one of my classes/schools next week. Grrrrreat. The good news is, after this woman called my boss, we had a big, fat teleconference and I was like, "guess what, I quit!" Which sounds wayyy cooler and more satisfactory than it actually is, since it stands in my contract explicitly than I cannot quit, I can only say I refuse to renew it after the end of the school year. So yeah. That's what the plan is. Which we all know has been the plan since, like...October, but my boss was pretty surprised. She was all like, "I really hope you change your mind--think it over," and telling me that trained teachers at our company have the same problems that I do and worse, and offering me only to work in nursery schools next year. Which would partly solve the problem...but partly not. I mean, yeah, I have huge discipline problems in some of my schools...and really none with my little kids. But what I don't like is the whole "you don't work, you don't get paid" deal--and the fact that I commute like, 15 hours a week between schools, all unpaid. It's an enormous waste of time and a huge drain.
So yeah, now my boss knows that I'm done. And that's good. It's just a question of getting through the next four months. Ughhhhh.
But back to nice things: I got woken up by my future mother-in-law this morning--she's planning a coup at her parent's golden wedding anniversary including Stephan's and my surprise arrival. So we had to discuss that. It'll be hectic trying to get it all organized, but worth it--the grandparents will be out of their heads. Again, I'm soooo lucky to have such a wonderful second family. This whole entry is procrastination, though. I should be writing my invoice for work so that I can get paid this month--but it's so freaking obnoxious to write down where I was on what day, add all the hours together, add up how much money I should get...track down every single receipt from every single photocopy I've made for work, write down on the back of every receipt what I photocopied and for what class...and add up the amount. Is it any wonder that I'm putting it off?! Christ!
I really don't want to talk about work any more, though. I'm lucky to have one, period. And I'm working on finding out what would be better/more fulfilling for me...and gasp! possibly long term. If you have suggestions, holleratcha girl. So far, I've spent the morning conspiring, sleeping on the couch during biathlon and watching the Nordic skiing world cup. It's so cool. You can sleep, wake up, get excited, sleep some more, wake up, watch amazing skiiers...it's incredibly relaxing. And I need to be relaxed if I'm going to rock my evening tonight. Thursday, I rebelled against the fact that I had to get up at 6am and went to an English-speaking social thing-y at a bar in Mitte. I was supposed to meet Katie, a friend of mine there, but I was early and she was late so I started talking to these girls who I thought were British. I was like "hey, do you guys know Katie Turner?" --"noooo" "Oh. Are you here for the English-speaking social thing?" ---"noooo, we're not English." "Uhh, well Katie's Scottish" --"we're not Scottish either." "Oh! Well, where are you from?" --"Iceland, Iceland and Denmark." At this point, I was kinda embarrassed and was ready to leave, but they were so nice and my gin tonic was still full, so I sat down with them and started to chat. Two hours later, I finally caught a glimpse of Katie, who'd been afraid I wasn't coming at all, but by then it was so late, I could only chat with her for a few minutes before I really had to head home. Still, it was hilarious. So the two Icelandic girls are throwing a party tonight and I'm really excited. I think it'll be a riotous good time. I also find it hilarious that I went to this thing hoping to network with english-speakers and wound up chilling with english-speaking scandinavians. Ri-ot.
But before I get to play, I have to survive dinner at Christian and Cindy's new apartment. 'Nuff said, I hope. Cindy actually said "hey! maybe we can have that board-game night we've always been meaning to have!" I tried to put it off on her being drunk, but...no. She was serious. Fortunately there's a boxing match tonight that Stephan really wants to see, so he'll make sure we're out of there in time. Niiiice.
Anyway, time to decide if I'm going to the hardware store or the gym. H'mmmmm.
kiss. (first cheek)
kiss. (other cheek)
.mia.
Saturday, March 03, 2007
New Apartment, Moving and other Whatnot
So yeah, it's been a while, as usual--things keep happening that keep me from posting. Like insane work (I'm subbing twice this week and have picked up two new classes of my own in the last month), doing crazy open-classrooms where I have to answer to the parents if the kids are their usual insane selves and...drumroll please...MOVING!!! Yeah, shit's been wild. But now things are sort of starting to settle--Stephan and I are completely moved in and starting to slowly acquire all the inane little things one needs to be self sufficient (i.e. vegetable peelers, vaccuum cleaners, mops...spices, plants--I could go on but I'll stop). It's cool. I've thrown a few pictures up on facebook of us in our first transitional weekend. I don't really like the baby pink kitchen or the lime-green living room, but we made a deal with the previous tenant that she could just give us the cash and we'd do the painting ourselves, so we could move in faster. I saw both my old roomates for the first time today on the way to the gym. It was a little weird. They both nabbed Stephan because they can't get their TV or their washing machine to work. I really had to swallow my laughter. The "man" in this relationship cannot (and I wish I were joking here) cannot change a freaking lightbulb. Really. I must have posted this priceless story before--but yeah. I had to show him how. Silly me, I thought Chrsitian was being sarcastic. Nope. So I'm really not surprised they need Stephan to come play handyman. I'm not overly traditionalist when it comes to gender roles, really I'm not. I can change lightbulbs and kill spiders and figure out why the toilet doesn't flush or whatever...but it's really nice not to have to, you know?
AAAAAAAAAAAnyway.
Tonight should be fun/weird/interesting. We're invited to the housewarming party of the people who moved into our apartment. Nice gesture, I thought. Christian and Cindy are planning on putting in an appearance, so I invited Julia for moral racous support. And besides, showing up at a party where you used to live, with an entourage...I love it. The girls that moved in there seemed nice, and if it's too "pass the wine, dahhling", we can always roll out to Julia's or something. And it's nice to not be totally spießig and go out for a change on the weekends. Last weekend was the roomate-change party at Julia's place, which was a glorious, glorious riot. She said they had to kick some weird Belgians out at 5am. We were long gone (both literally and figuratively) at that point, but it's a testament to the kind of party it was. I rocked the gin-soaked small-talk and occasionally checked on Stephan and his best friend Matthias (who was an absolute legend and came down for the weekend with his dad's SUV to help us move). Riotous good times all around. Late-breaking News: just found out that Christian and Cindy will be coming here preparty and we'll all be leaving together. I'm really hoping that I'm just being myself and seeing the situation overly pessimistically. Maybe it'll be nice. Great is out of the question, but there should be enough people there so that I can ignore them. God, do I sound like a bitch. However, these people made me feel unwelcome and uncomfortable in my own house. For like, the better part of four months. Not necessarily an unforgivable crime, but really...I just don't have the burning desire to have anything to further to do with them. Bahhh. Before I have time to work myself into a lather over this, I'm going to sign off and ummm...work on thinking positively. i.e. pregame.
love,
.mia.
AAAAAAAAAAAnyway.
Tonight should be fun/weird/interesting. We're invited to the housewarming party of the people who moved into our apartment. Nice gesture, I thought. Christian and Cindy are planning on putting in an appearance, so I invited Julia for moral racous support. And besides, showing up at a party where you used to live, with an entourage...I love it. The girls that moved in there seemed nice, and if it's too "pass the wine, dahhling", we can always roll out to Julia's or something. And it's nice to not be totally spießig and go out for a change on the weekends. Last weekend was the roomate-change party at Julia's place, which was a glorious, glorious riot. She said they had to kick some weird Belgians out at 5am. We were long gone (both literally and figuratively) at that point, but it's a testament to the kind of party it was. I rocked the gin-soaked small-talk and occasionally checked on Stephan and his best friend Matthias (who was an absolute legend and came down for the weekend with his dad's SUV to help us move). Riotous good times all around. Late-breaking News: just found out that Christian and Cindy will be coming here preparty and we'll all be leaving together. I'm really hoping that I'm just being myself and seeing the situation overly pessimistically. Maybe it'll be nice. Great is out of the question, but there should be enough people there so that I can ignore them. God, do I sound like a bitch. However, these people made me feel unwelcome and uncomfortable in my own house. For like, the better part of four months. Not necessarily an unforgivable crime, but really...I just don't have the burning desire to have anything to further to do with them. Bahhh. Before I have time to work myself into a lather over this, I'm going to sign off and ummm...work on thinking positively. i.e. pregame.
love,
.mia.
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